Halla

It has been way over a month since I visited this place and shared
some rants with you all. Life has been such a blur to me, all I see
when I look back is the faces of the people I got to bar and club hop
with, the people I got home at 5am in the morning, woke up to a
hangover with and did it all over again like for 6 straight weeks
with. I also get flashes of my first days in the office when I barely
knew who I was there and what I was doing.

My communication skills have been appalling, all my friends can atest
to that. It makes me so sad. I think growing up is taking a toll on my
social side and now I see why adult life is lived with such few
friends. I go through so many thoughts, calculations, deadlines and
calls in a day that when I get home my brain is still working on
overdrive and I'm trying so hard to unwind and relax and get in touch
with Pam. Today is the first morning in a loooong time, that I have
woken up alone, with nothing to do on the agenda. And it is the
scariest thing. I can't find Pam. I am sooo used to being busy or
having someone close that I have kind of lost me for a moment.

I spoke to a blast from the past, my ex non boyfriend that I flung
with last year. We haven't spoken in a coupled of months coz there was
nothing more to say. He had moved on with a new gf and all. I had
finally come to terms with the fact that it was the END. And then he
decides to call me from the sky!!! I was at work when he called and I
slipped out vof the office drama and into a rather schizo convo.
He was telling me he had a few glasses of wine and missed me. Alluded
to the fact that he misses me quite often, wanted to see me. He took
the time out to highlight that he is leaving this Sunday and asked me
90 times where my offices were. Oh my friggin days! Guys are such
opportunists!!! He probably just wanted a quick fix! I don't know how
I feel. But I don't wanna see him. Nah ah.

So like I said I am sitting in bed trying to get in touch with Pam and
a big indicator that I am not in touch is my not being aware of how I
feel about ex-non-bf calling. Ah. Whatevs.

Work is cool, I'm loving it. Its just this week was soooo intense for
me. I am a campaign manager in training. So I assist a campaign
manager to learn what the role entails. This Friday she was away in
Cape Town and I had to be her. It was flames!!!!!!! Heeeee

Oh man got to go! Miss you all

Xxx

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